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Why Mothering with Purpose?


It slipped out casually during a therapy session. But I heard it. I'm concerned about your relationship with your children. 

My mothering wasn't the topic at hand, so we moved on. But it was implanted in my brain and I poured over it repeatedly until our next session when I brought it up.

I sat across from my therapist as he gently apologized for the way he said it, but reiterated that the truth was still there.

I know how it happened too. I get into a "get it done" mindset. I see my children more as tasks to accomplish than people to love on and be purposeful in building a relationship with. I find myself there so easily. I can, however, usually catch myself and see when I'm falling into the tendency. 

It didn't happen overnight. It was a slow shift. A shift that meant I wasn't really being present or looking people in the eyes. I was just trying to get through each day in one piece.

Life wasn't even particularly difficult. It was just that I had inserted myself into a survival mode that I didn't even realize I was living. Just going through the motions. Therefore, it happened without much notice on my part. That is until my therapist brought it up.

I'm thankful for the boldness of my therapist to speak into my heart. It helped me start to be aware of the quality of mothering I was doing. This wasn't the kind of mother I wanted to be.

This is why mothering with purpose is so important. We can easily get stuck in survival mode or just the mundane nature of everyday life and forget to slow down and pay attention. Forget to be purposeful in how we parent and love our children. Building lasting, meaningful relationships. Pouring into their life. Shaping them into the people they will one day become.

I love what Sally Clarkson says in The Mission of Motherhood:

The fundamental mission of motherhood now is the same as it always was: to nurture, protect, and instruct children, to create a home environment that enables them to learn and grow, to help them develop a heart for God and his purposes, and to send them out into the world prepared to live both fully and meaningfully.

Motherhood is such a forward-focused job. We are investing in the future. We must think past today. We must live and mother with purpose.

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