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The Struggle of Mothering with Purpose


I have been feeling like such a hypocrite lately. Sharing on this site about mothering with purpose while struggling to do it in my own life. 

It's given me a bit of writer's block and a lack of motivation to put the work into this site. I've been avoiding writing because of it.

I've been stuck in a negative thought pattern and struggling to climb out as well.

But what benefit is that for anyone, especially myself? Instead of avoiding this, I'm going to lean into this struggle and share some thoughts.

Here's the truth: Mothering with purpose is messy and imperfect and hard.

People get sick (even the mom!), kids go off the rails, the house becomes a disaster. It happens all too easy, am I right? We are going to have weeks when we rock it and others where putting dinner on the table is the best we can do.

You get it. 

I know you do because you are right in the trenches with me.

Life is going strong and you are full of purpose and then something knocks you off your feet. Then it's a struggle.

The struggle is real. And all too common.

It doesn't negate your desire to mother with purpose. It is a hard pursuit. It's a worthy pursuit. But we cannot pursue this purposeful mothering journey with perfection. We simply cannot.

My latest struggle started with managing a child crisis and in the midst of that getting sick (like in bed for days sick). Then, like I said above, I struggled immensely with negative self-talk that made me feel like a failure and a hypocrite.

Your struggle will likely look different. Maybe your whole family came down with the flu, or your husband is traveling for two weeks and you are solo parenting. Maybe you are dealing with behavioral problems from one of your children, or maybe you are a special needs parent that simply doesn't get enough breaks to refill your own tank. Maybe you are battling insomnia or just got a daunting diagnosis.

The truth is simply that we all find ourselves struggling from time to time.

What are we to do when we find ourselves shoulder-deep, nearly drowning, in the mess of life and struggling to mother with purpose?

1. Focus on what is right in front of you.

As Emily P. Freeman says, let's simply do the next right thing in love. What is an urgent and pressing need? Do that first. Then do the next and the next.

2. Focus on necessities.

What absolutely has to be done? Think food, laundry, school (if you are a homeschooler, but even still just the necessities). Focus your attention there. What is most essential? Do that and simply that.

3. Focus on rest.

Don't numb yourself with Netflix or eat your feelings. Rest appropriately. Like actually go to bed early. Or take a nap.

4. Focus on Christ.

There is no expectation of perfection. There is grace. If you are feeling condemnation, that is not from Christ. You don't have to hold everything together. Soak in His peace and grace in this season of struggling.

Know this: The struggle doesn't last forever. 

Life finds it's way back to normal and you can pursue mothering with purpose again, full force. But don't wear yourself out thinking about that right now. Just know that this season of suffering will eventually end. Either by actually ending or by finding a new normal.

Friends, I don't pretend to know what struggle you are facing right now. But know that you are not alone.

1 comment:

  1. Hang in there sweet Momma, praying for some easier days ahead !

    ReplyDelete

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